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Rigid In My Thinking – Bike Snob NYC

August 27, 2025
in Cycling
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Additional to yesterday’s submit, I didn’t understand Mick Jagger’s bike had in truth been on the market:

That’s essentially the most thrilling piece of cycling-themed superstar memorabilia since Rosie O’Donnell’s Budnitz:

O’Donnell after all has since fled the USA (definitely one of the vital inhospitable locations on this planet to be a well-to-do superstar), and now lives in Eire, the place she is lastly free from each persecution and Budnitzes.

However you don’t actually know something about tyranny and oppression till you’ve lived beneath the iron fist of the UCI, and their subsequent draconian act might be a ban on 32-inch wheels:

I had no thought 32-inch wheels had even caught on within the first place, however apparently they’re sufficient of a risk to…non-giants, I suppose?…{that a} ban could also be coming:

A number of business sources have confirmed to Escape Collective that the UCI is actively contemplating a brand new mountain bike wheel dimension rule that will cap sizes on the present 29″ commonplace, successfully banning the rising 32″ format earlier than it may take maintain in elite competitors.

In keeping with these aware of the matter, the proposal continues to be in an exploratory part, however indications are that it’ll observe the identical sample as latest rule adjustments on handlebar width, rim depth, and equipment ratios: a interval of quiet sounding-out, adopted by formal implementation. 

I for one have fun the upcoming ban, for 2 causes:

Racing isn’t actual life, sports activities have gazillions of guidelines, and if you happen to’re an athlete then obeying a bunch of arbitrary selections is what you signed up for, so cope with it. And everybody else is free to trip whichever goofy-ass bike they need anyway, so who cares?

I’m mechanically towards something that’s new and with regards to bike stuff I say ban it first and ask questions later:

In truth, the UCI ought to have banned the mountain bike again within the ’80s. If they’d the world would have been a lot better off. Certain, mountain bikes appeared innocent sufficient at first, even when the Euros obtained into the act:

However now take a look at them:

Buncha watermelon-humpers.

Look, clearly individuals can be humping watermelons with or with out the UCI (in truth if it wasn’t for the UCI it could in all probability be inconceivable to purchase a hardtail, although I’m undecided even the professionals race these anymore), however what the hell did they want mountain bikes for within the first place, anyway? There was already a type of offroad bicycle racing, and it was referred to as “cyclocross:”

Come on, take a look at that lovely image! We actually didn’t want mountain bikes in any respect, not to mention gravel bikes. It was all proper there! I imply what are we even doing right here, anyway?!?

Additionally, the perversion of the bicycle that’s the fashionable mountain bike is exclusive on this planet of sporting-type biking in that it’s a bicycle that basically doesn’t wish to be a bicycle. Even a space-age highway bike doesn’t do something essentially in a different way than an outdated highway bike:

The supplies have modified, the braking floor has moved nearer to the hub, and the derailleurs are remote-controlled, but it surely’s nonetheless only a diamond body and a pair of wheels. Whether or not you’re carrying a wool jersey on a metal bike or a PNS Mechanism on a plastic one you’re principally participating in the identical exercise:

The mountain bike nevertheless went from one thing strong and easy to a telescoping, undulating, articulating Mars rover-type contraption that turns into out of date after like two years:

Like severely, these mountain bike individuals will warn you about using bikes from 5 years in the past:

In case you’re out there for a motorcycle that’s a lot older than 2020, it can typically have noticeably completely different geometry and dealing with in comparison with a brand new equal, and the additional again you go, the larger the hole can be.

Although they are going to charitably acknowledge that it’s attainable to trip a bicycle from waaay again in 2015:

Simply because a motorcycle has been round some time, that doesn’t imply it must be changed to expertise up-to-date dealing with. Take my different half’s 2015 Mondraker Cunning (above). With a 160 mm fork (up from the 140 mm inventory fork), a -2 diploma headset and the saddle slammed totally ahead on the seatpost, its key numbers (attain, head angle, wheelbase, efficient seat angle) aren’t far off what you’d discover new in 2024. Certain, it nonetheless has non-Enhance axles, a pair of 27.5″ wheels and abominable cable routing. However so far as dealing with goes, it’s strong. Throw in an upgraded shock, tires and brakes and it nonetheless very a lot does the enterprise.

In fact that article was from 2024, so who is aware of if any of it’s nonetheless true.

By the best way, the identical website has a press launch on a brand new bike from Sklar:

Good of them to share a non-suspension bike made from metallic I suppose, however the feedback from the indignant Watermelon Humperati broke what was left of my mind.

What can I say, I suppose I’ve bizarre style in bikes:

Regardless of my three satisfying days on ol’ Pinky, returning to the sprightly but luxurious Roadini made me understand that taking that bike as a substitute of this one on trip with me can be loopy.

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