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Well We Got That Figured Out – Bike Snob NYC

Februar 4, 2026
in Cycling
Reading Time: 11 mins read
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I’m surprised–STUNNED–by each the amount and the standard of your submissions to the Bike Snob One thing Spirit Of Gravel Free Lubricant Contest or regardless of the hell I known as it. STUNNED, I let you know. I imply right here I’m looking and trying to find the mysterious and elusive Spirit of Gravel, one thing no human has as of but been capable of efficiently outline, after which somebody simply sends me the reply in an e-mail asking just for a bottle of chain lube in return:

Towards a Unified Framework for the Spirit of Gravel

The Spirit of Gravel (hereafter, SPOG) is a multidimensional assemble—one which resists definition whereas concurrently demanding it. Whereas generally related to bicycles, gravel, and driving bicycles on gravel, SPOG is best understood as an expertise layer that overlays these actions.

Researchers (and by researchers, we imply riders with opinions) typically agree on a number of core attributes:

Intentional inefficiency — selecting routes which are slower, rougher, and extra narratively satisfying

Curated authenticity — showing unconcerned with appearances whereas optimizing them aggressively

Gear minimalism — achieved via maximal tools

Transcendence through inconvenience — mechanical, meteorological, or existential

Importantly, SPOG just isn’t about racing—until racing is framed as “not racing.” In such instances, aggressive habits might happen, supplied it’s accompanied by disclaimers.

The Spirit of Gravel emphasizes freedom—although not infinite freedom. Quite, it’s a bounded freedom, outlined by tire clearance, acceptable colour palettes, and the shared understanding that pavement is an ethical failure until rebranded as “connector.”

A key paradox emerges right here:

Gravel is about escape

Escape requires documentation

Documentation requires stopping

Stopping undermines circulation

Move is optionally available

Thus, SPOG exists most absolutely after the journey, throughout reflection, caption-writing, and lightweight self-mythologization.

In abstract—although summaries could also be untimely—the Spirit of Gravel is much less a factor than a course of. A strategy of changing into barely dustier, barely slower, and considerably extra sure that this was the proper option to journey.

P.S. FRTHR STDY N GRVL MNY LRN THS: GRVL ≠ RD; IT ≠ JMP; SPD ≠ GUD; DUST = ESSNTL.

Unimaginable. That is like somebody casually texting you the answer to a kind of nice unsolved mathematical issues whereas they’re sitting on the bathroom:

[I have no idea what this means but it looks pretty intense.]

Look, I could not have accomplished it myself, however I nonetheless deserve full credit score for fixing the issue that has been vexing the biking media since no less than 2013 when gravel was invented. In any case, it was I who supplied the spark by beginning this contest, which can quickly be often known as the biking world’s equal of the Nobel Prize. And but all these different bike publications will proceed to behave like we haven’t discovered gravel since they should proceed to justify their existence, and to that finish they’ll maintain pushing nonsense like this:

Right here’s the speculation:

Like a frog in a pot that’s slowly heated to boiling, tires began getting wider and knobbier. Then got here suspension, somewhat bit at first and solely within the entrance, till ultimately, many gravel bikers had been saying, “Yeah, rear suspension may clean issues out much more.” Now, it’s solely a matter of time till a vital mass of those contemporary dust disciples uncover what a game-changer dropper posts are.

After all, as mountain bikers, we knew all of this was coming. Nobody wants a particular bike for driving on gravel — “Simply journey a mountain bike!” we cried. In any case, we’ve been slogging up hearth roads actually because the starting, mixing surfaces and having the occasions of our lives within the woods, distant from the din and hazard of visitors.

NO NO NO NO NO.

No.

Foolish, delusional mountain bikers.

Gravel bikes weren’t invented to “flip roadies into mountain bikers.” Gravel bikes had been invented as a result of mountain bikers are LITERALLY THE WORST and turned completely good bikes into freakish articulating excessive sports activities equipment that have to be shuttled to trailheads in pickup vehicles and which have extra in frequent with ATVs than they do bicycles–particularly now that they’ve motors. MOTORS. So the bike business needed to journey again 30-plus years into the previous like Bruce Willis in “12 Monkeys” to earlier than the virus received launched so as to re-learn what bikes needs to be like, then they needed to re-introduce the so-called “mountain bike” beneath a brand new identify since that time period had lengthy since turn into tainted by the Watermelon Humpers:

And make no mistake: the truth that “gravel bikes” now more and more have suspension and dropper posts just isn’t an indication that the bicycle business is in some way coming to its senses; reasonably, it’s merely proof that they’re making the identical mistake but once more, since doubling down is their specialty. [To wit: pretty much every bike boom.] They didn’t flip roadies into mountain bikers; they turned mountain bikers into electrical motorcyclists, and they also needed to reinvent the mountain bike with a brand new identify, solely now that’s additionally changing into an electrical motorbike:

[Only Twelve Thousand Nine Hundred and Ninety-Nine American Fun Tickets!™]

This implies in 10 or 20 years they’ll must reinvent the straightforward all-around bicycle but once more with yet one more identify impressed by yet one more floor everyone’s at all times ridden on and by no means gave a lot thought to till it grew to become a advertising and marketing time period. Perhaps they’ll name it a “Soil Bike.”

Jesus, even GCN has figured it out:

All-terrain bicycles that had been designed to be ridden over lengthy distances? Wow, what an idea! The truth that the bike media in 2026 is blown away by the idea of a rideable mountain bike actually says all of it.

Talking of soil biking, it seems to be like that New Hampshire bicycle registration legislation isn’t going to occur:

Although not everyone is happy:

Not all of the testimony was against the invoice. Harmony-area farmer Don Ross has a number of hundred acres of his land in conservation easements that enable public entry by foot however not bicycle or horses. He stated mountain bikers frequently journey throughout his property and trigger crop injury and he wish to see the laws create assets for authorities to implement the ban on bikes, together with some sort of registration that allowed riders to be recognized. He famous that components of his property seem on Strava maps of mountain bike routes.

“We have now no approach of figuring out these folks; they gained’t give us their names. There’s no registration sticker on their helmet, on their bike or something for me to only snap an image of with out confrontation. It places the burden on the landowner and that’s unfair. … how will we shield the non-public land house owners which are offering trails for the general public? We’d like your assist. It has been ongoing for years and years,” he testified. 

Wait a minute. Can’t you simply shoot at them? Appears simple sufficient. Hey, I’m not saying I’m in favor of it, however as an inveterate urbanite it was my understanding from films and TV that if somebody was a-trespassin’ in your property you could possibly no less than shake your fist then take a pot shot or two at them. I do know once I’m driving upstate I see scary indicators with bullets on them and I can guarantee you that’s sufficient for me. It definitely appears more practical than making an attempt to name in some sort of helmet quantity–although possibly the Good Hat was an thought forward of its time:

Australia actually is probably the most superior helmet nation on Earth.

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