I like my bikes the best way I like my tuna melts: no batteries, no Bluetooth connections, and no suspension techniques.

That’s why I favor a motorbike just like the Homer…

…over a motorbike just like the Kona Aburrido or no matter it’s known as:

I imply it’s nice if that’s what you’re into, however I merely don’t wanna cope with these items:

On the identical time, I don’t solely like smart metal bikes with friction shifting and fenders. All of us have our turn-ons that defy logic and pragmatism, and mine is highway racing bikes. Certain, sure issues like disc brakes can damage it for me, since they’re kind of like spinach within the tooth:

However as a lot as I fancy myself a daily “Joe Tuna Soften” I additionally do get the visceral enchantment of a high-end highway racing bike, and I nonetheless take pleasure in using them.
The issue is that they’re costly. Some folks say Rivendae are costly as a result of they price greater than Surlys or no matter (FOR CHRISSAKES STOP COMPARING RIVENDELLS TO SURLYS), however high-end highway racing bikes are costly. For instance, right here’s one which I’ve chosen kind of at random:

The bike is seemingly straightforward to experience (no matter meaning), however that’s not what we’re right here:

What we’re is the worth, and this one prices fifteen thousand {dollars}:

Which is similar to what different pro-level race bikes prices:

Now, I’m not saying that is fallacious or something like that. Certain, I do assume the title is horrible. “ENVE Melee,” actually?!? They could as properly have known as it the ENVE Meanie Miney Moe. However the worth is the worth, and completely no one is forcing you to purchase an ENVE Melee. The truth is, so far as highway bikes go, in case you ignore the stratospherically-priced top-of-the-line fashions the Freds of immediately arguably have it higher than the Freds of yesteryear.
However, in case you do wish to personal a top-of-the-line highway bike, this does pose a little bit of a sensible drawback for anybody who doesn’t have $15,000 to spend on a hunk of plastic. Certain, you will get a lower-end mannequin, however it’s not the identical factor. Nicely, nice, virtually talking is similar factor, since no one’s scranus can detect the distinction between the moduli of carbon fibers; for that matter, a blindfolded Fred couldn’t even inform Dura-Ace from 105, and Pogačar in all probability would have gained the Tour on a Bikesdirect particular. Nonetheless, let’s enable that there’s a sure kick that comes from using a race bike with the “greatest” stuff (even when the kick relies nearly solely on the logos you see while you put your head down), and at that worth a motorbike just like the ENVE Melee (Jesus, that title!) stays the area of the rich and/or financially reckless. Certain, Richard Branson might be able to get a motorbike like that, however even he can’t afford a jersey to go together with it:

BUT!
The excellent news is that these stratospheric costs can’t undermine the perfect factor about bikes. And what’s the easiest factor about bikes? Is it the liberty? Is it the enjoyment they confer to their riders? Is it the truth that a cheap bike is simply as able to granting each pleasure and freedom as an costly one?
Nah.
It’s the depreciation!
At $15,000 chances are you’ll not be capable to purchase Pogačar’s Colnago:

However for a tenth of that worth you might purchase Johan Museeuw’s Colnago, which on the time appeared no much less unique, and which immediately additionally has the excellence of being iconic:

In fact it helps so much to be sufficiently old to have wished these bikes after they had been new, which is unlucky for the younger, who lack not solely cash however the vital perspective to understand a real discount. To them a motorbike like this in all probability appears primitive, however to me it’s a dream bike, and the shortage of something that requires batteries or fluids solely makes it higher:

Oh positive, the Dream Bikes Of Yesteryear gained’t include a dual-sided energy meter (I don’t even know what meaning) just like the Tarmac SL8, however the excellent news is you you don’t want that, since you suck. How do I do know you suck? As a result of in case you didn’t suck somebody wouldn’t solely have given you that Specialised S-Works Tarmac SL8 with a dual-sided energy meter already, however you’d even be getting a paycheck to be able to experience it.
In fact the actual query is whether or not the bikes of immediately can be equally fascinating in 20 years. 9-speed cassettes are actually low-cost and ample, however will you be capable to get a firmware replace for a wi-fi drivetrain in 2044? It might be that by then a 2003 LeMond can be simpler to maintain on the highway than a 2024 ENVE Melee. Solely time will inform.
Both approach, given the worth of a top-of-the-line race bike immediately, it’s in all probability well worth the wait.